MISSION: Sailor Moon!

Copyright 1996 by Henry J. Cobb  [hcobb@slip.net]

Serena was wandering through the fog of dreams when she heard a familiar
voice.

"Hello, Hello, is this thing on?"

Serena stumbled towards the voice and found herself before a regal
figure on a throne.

"Hi me!" Serena greeted then corrected herself "I mean your majesty."

"Ssssh!" Neo-queen Serenity admonished her younger self "This is an
insecure channel, don't speak, just listen."

"You mean the Negaverse is monitoring my dreams?" Serena gasped.

"No" Serenity explained, "you talk in your sleep and we don't want Luna
to think we are any more of a loser."

"Thats not true!"  Serena and a small black cat seated next to the
throne said at the same time and in the same tone and as close to the
same expression as cat features would allow.

Serena was chastised by this display and stood in shocked silence while
the queen's councilor continued "That's five credits you owe me, your
majesty."

"We should know better than to bet you about ourselves, Luna" the queen
admitted then continued to the schoolgirl "Agent Serena, your mission,
and you had best choose to accept it, involves the following persons."

Serenity gestured and an image appeared.

"Molly" Serena noted.

"Good, we were not sure you would remember her, you have not seen her
since yesterday."  Serenity let this comment sink in then continued "We
have reason to believe that she will be attacked by this man."

The queen gestured and another image appeared.

"Ohhhhh, what a dreamy hunk!"  Serena clasped her hands as her eyes
turned into hearts.

"Which means?" the queen inquired.

Serena thought about it for a minute, then concluded "He's from the
Negaverse?"

"Exactly" Serenity confirmed "We think he thought, we mean will think,
that she is us, we mean you and.... Pluto, how do we say this?"

The queen looked around for a while then continued "That is just like
the master of time, never around when we need her!"

"Anyway" Serenity turned back to her younger self, "you can not prevent
his draining her, or her falling in love with him, but you must prevent
her eloping with him, as they will be totaled by a drunk driver."

"How do I do that?" Serena wondered.

"We do not know" the queen admitted, "nothing we tried worked, maybe if
we had gone over and insisted on doing homework together..."

Serena made a face at the suggestion of doing homework.

"Just try something!" Serenity admonished her younger self. "We do not
consider trading the life of our best friend for one negascum acceptable
losses."

Serena was pleased to hear that the intervening years would not make her
a vicious person.

"Now maybe if she had gotten three or four..."  the queen pondered this.
"Let us just say that if you blow this one klutz, we shall deny that you
were ever our past selves."

"Why do you always speak in plural?"  Serena wondered.

"Everything we feel, you will come to agree with, after bitter
experience."  Serenity replied "And it says we have to in the handbook
for new royalty.  You will be amazed at the things the British learned
after the Diana fiasco.  Which reminds us, study you ditz, you would not
wish to be queen of the world and a functional illiterate, now would
you?"

"You seem to do OK" Serena suggested.

The queen ignored this comment and flatly stated "This dream will
self-destruct in five seconds."

"Wait!" Serena called "What's the secret to picking up hunky guys?"

"How should we know?" Serenity replied "We only went out with one man,
but if you let him touch you before you are eighteen, we shall scream at
him in the here and now.  We had best drop into his dreams and tell him
that ourselves, but first we shall slip into something more
comfortable."

"What!"  Serena gasped.

The alarm clock went off.

"Waaaah!" Serena sat up in bed, tears gushing from both eyes "How come
I'm always picking on me!"