Title: True Feelings ? Part 1 (revised) Author: Alicia Blade E-Mail: Kammi22@sprintmail.com Rating: G Hiya people, remember THIS story??? I swear, it always comes back to haunt me? I?ve been asked to write a sequel to the sequel and finally decided, ya know what? I?m gonna make this into an actual multi-part story instead. It just seems? easier. I would like to be able to tell you it?ll only be three parts, but, well? with these people always asking for more, I can?t make many promises. We?ll see what happens. Anyway, for those of you who have not yet read this fic, it?s a first season romance centering around Usagi and Mamoru?s TRUE FEELINGS. (Hence the name. Get it? GET IT???!!) Gomen nasai? Anyway, if you have already read it, well, read it again, ?cause I?ve changed quite a few things! And added more, obviously? And now for my announcements! First off, go visit Chibi-Usa?s Bedtime Stories at: http://www.50megs.com/sailorm/fanfic.htm I LOVE this site!! The archives are pretty bare, so all you authors had better send your fics in! Trust me, you?ll be glad you did! Sailor M does wonders, making all the posted stories look so beautiful!! Also, First Luv is MOVING to xoom! The site is still under construction, but at least now you?ll be able to sign the guestbook!! So please go look at it, and if you did before, go again and sign away!!! http://members.xoom.com/firstluv And now, enjoy! ?If you really want to live, you must stop doing wrong and start doing right. I, the Lord God All-Powerful, Will then be on your side, Just as you claim I am.? Amos 5:14 True Feelings ? Part 1 It?s funny. Hilarious, really. Sometimes I?ll find myself lying in bed staring at the ceiling, and I?ll just break out laughing. Just the idea, the concept, is so absurd, it can be hard not to laugh. But then, after my eyes are watery from the laughter, I relax. And it once again becomes the most confusing problem, if it?s a problem, I?ve ever had to endure. You see, there is this girl. Usagi. Though in my mind, I?ll find myself referring to her as Usako. My little rabbit. Anyway, I?ve talked to this girl, or rather, I?ve teased her, on occasion. It?s not my fault I can be so mean to her. For one thing, she is absolutely adorable when she is angry, and for another, I just seem to get all tongue-tied and nervous whenever I see her. I?ll try to come up with something nice to say, a compliment maybe, but instead, insults come out. Baka! Baka! Baka! Oh, I don?t think I?ve explained her to you yet. Usako is, well, the most annoying crybaby klutz you will ever know in this lifetime. She has this way of wailing in this awful tone that could easily break an eardrum. I should know. I think I somehow bring this wail out of her. Why me? But, no matter how annoying she gets, she?s still my sweet, loving, innocent Usako. Or at least, I wish she was mine. The funny part you say? I?m getting to that. There?s another girl, too. At least, I think she exists. It could just be my imagination, but, she seems so real! I?ve had many dreams about her. Or more like, I?ve had the same dream over and over. She?s a princess. Beautiful, and graceful, and mature. And I?m sure that if I could find her, she would love me. And I would love her. Like, that is how it?s supposed to be. Destiny, or fate, or something. That is, if I could get over Usagi. Yeah, I know what you?re thinking. Ditch the crybaby, she hates you anyway, and go get your princess. Ha! Like it?s that easy! Don?t you think I?ve tried to get over Usagi? For one thing, she?s fourteen. I?m twenty. How would that relationship work out? And honestly, (here?s the funny part), I would forget about the princess. I would give up on her in a heartbeat. If I could just have Usagi. If I could hold her, and kiss her, and know that she really is my Usako, I would never think about the princess again. And you know what? I would be happier than I have ever been known to be. ***laughter*** Ugh! I was doing it again! Thinking about him! How does he do it? How can he make me feel this way? Aren?t I supposed to hate him? With all the things he?s called me, like...odanga atama...okay, bad example. Secretly, I like it when he calls me that. Not that I?d ever admit it. It?s just that? I mean, it?s kinda cute? and I hear that in America, Dumpling is a term of endearment. Sigh? if only he called me that for the same reason? Ha, but like he ever would. He doesn?t feel anything special like that for me. I know that? It?s all just wishful thinking. Still, I have my own little daydreams and fantasies. Where for once, I?ll be walking down the sidewalk and see him standing there smiling at me with those gorgeous blue eyes. And then I run headlong into him, and feel his warm arms wrap around me and his deep voice call me something sweet and romantic, like Usako. I?d gladly be his little rabbit. And I?d call him Mamo-chan. Hee-hee. Mamo-chan. Sigh? But, no. He?s still just plain, old, mean Mamoru. Who happens to be driving me insane! What?s wrong with me anyway? Even if he didn?t hate me, which I know he does, he could never LOVE me. Not like I love him, at least. Is that it then? I?m in love with him? Something deep down tells me that it?s true. In fact, I know it is. I?ve been in love with him since the second I saw him. No, the second I heard his voice. He called me odanga atama, but like that mattered. I was so busy trying to calm the butterflies in my stomach, I could hardly reply to his insults. To this day, I don?t know what I said to him. But what does it matter now? I?m still the crybaby with the impossible older crush, and he?s, well, the impossible older crush. Oh well. I?ve never been one to give up hope, and I?m certainly not going to now. Maybe, someday, I will hear him call me Usako, and then he will forever be my Mamo-chan. ***Ugh! There go those daydreams again!*** For those who don?t know, Baka means idiot. As in: The con formerly known as Baka, presently titled Sakura-con. Tee hee, gomen. Um? never mind, just ignore me. Catcha later! Luv and God bless! <3 Alicia