AUTHOR'S NOTE: I apologize for my hiatus. Now that things in my life are back on track, I'll be sure to finish the next part of "The Dark Shall Fall" and add a few more stories before I head off for school. Thanks for being so patient! This story contains incredible spoilers for the mid-S season. If you read any farther, just be aware that this is my personal interpretation of Haruka and Michiru. Enjoy.... Standard disclaimers apply. Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon, and all translations into other languages, are copyright of their respective owners. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Indulgence By: Gramarye -------------------------------------------------------------------- They're accusing, like always without knowing What is just fiction or what is the truth They have no mission, they have no passion But they dare to tell us what's bad and what's good! Stand up, join us, modern crusaders alive We have the power to face the future 'Cause we are the fighters Just fighting for our fights -- Enigma "Modern Crusaders" --------------------------------------------------------------------- The apartment smelled musty and unused. The red light on the answering machine was blinking impatiently, signaling that there were plenty of important calls that had been put off while the apartment owners were out traipsing to deserted cathedrals in the middle of the ocean. "Haruka, are you feeling all right?" "For the fiftieth time, Michiru, I'm fine. I'm just tired, that's all, and I want to sleep." "How can you think about sleep at a time like this? There's just so much to do, and we haven't figured out anything from this fiasco." "Michiru...." Haruka's voice was very quiet. "I want to sleep. We can discuss this later on, when I'm not about to keel over in the doorway. Now, are you going to move?" "You can sleep at a time like this?" "I'm sure I could manage. And you need to get those cuts looked at. Do we have any iodine left over from last time? I think we're out of the gauze bandages, but there are some prepackaged ones we could use." Michiru placed a hand on her partner's shoulder. "Haruka, what about you?" She laughed hollowly. "One thing about Eudial, she had magnificent aim. You need to use some of that iodine as much as I do." The answering machine beeped irritably. Haruka grimaced. When she spoke again, her voice was barely above a whisper. "Eudial wasn't as thorough as I thought she was." "Eh? What do you mean?" Haruka slowly ran her hand along the wood of the doorframe. "Look, let's forget about it. I want to go to bed...are you coming?" Michiru gasped, her voice thin with disbelief. "I--no! I can't just 'forget' about it! Haruka...don't you understand what just-" "I told you, I don't really want to talk about it. It's not important, anyway. Goodnight." Michiru grabbed her partner by the hand. "I won't let you brush this off! I can't pretend that it didn't happen!" "Michiru," Haruka said stiffly, "I'm not brushing it off. I simply do not want to discuss this anymore. Isn't that enough?" The aqua-haired woman shook her head firmly. "No. No, it isn't." "DAMN IT, MICHIRU, IT SHOULD BE!" Haruka screamed. Breathing hard, she threw back her head. It took almost a minute for her to regain her composure. "What...." "Not enough?" "You...." "It's not good enough for you?" "I have to know." "No, you don't." "Haruka-" "But you won't be happy until I tell you, is that it? Is it?" "I-" "You want to hear the truth?" "You-" "You want to know what happened after I watched you die in front of me?" "When I-" "When the Messiah...." Michiru grabbed Haruka's arm. "Messiah?" she said sharply. "Messiah..." Haruka breathed, her eyes suddenly dimmed and without focus. "Messiah...the penalty...." Michiru let go. Haruka was breathing fast again, and pulses throbbed lightly in her temple and throat. Michiru stared at her partner; eyes wide with a tender, loving look. "Haruka, please...why did you do it?" Haruka paused. She slowly turned around, and folded her arms across her chest. She licked her lips very deliberately, as if choosing her words carefully. Her eyes glittered with a strange light. "Because our mission is to collect the Talismans. One was inside of me. I removed it. That's what we're supposed to do. Isn't that what you're always saying?" Michiru stared dumbly ahead of her. Her body was being doused, engulfed in icy water, pressing in on her eyes and mouth and nose, choking her, trying to invade her skin and seep into her pores. Some of it must have penetrated her defenses, because her veins were burning as the agonizing shock of frozen liquid drilled its way inside her. The room suddenly smelled strangely antiseptic, its white walls sterile and bleak in the faint light from the street below. "Isn't that right?" Haruka repeated. Michiru could have sworn that Haruka was smiling. But something told her that true smiles didn't look like that, weren't supposed to look like that. Not that cold. Not that mirthless. "Isn't that right, Michiru?" Is it? Was it? "Hai." Her tongue was thick and swollen in her mouth. "Good. I'm glad we agree." Haruka looked at the clock on the wall. "On second thought, I think I'll go for a drive." Michiru didn't answer. A thin trickle of dark blood dripped out of the side of her mouth and ran slowly down her chin. A few drops fell unnoticed on the carpet. Haruka stared at her partner for a moment, then turned and walked out of the room. "Don't wait up for me." The apartment door slammed once, and a key rattled in the lock. It was a testimony to Michiru's composure that the tears didn't fall until the sound of a car's motor had faded into the darkness. She walked quickly to the bathroom, and closed the door quickly and quietly. Without bothering to turn on the light, she groped for the medicine cabinet that hung just above the toilet. Her hands fumbled with the door, and several bottles of unidentifiable liquids spilled from the shelf, some falling into the sink, others onto the floor. Michiru grabbed a small bottle with a prescription label on it, and twisted the cap. It took her a minute of angry grunting and pulling before she remembered that she had to push down and turn to open the lid. Three tiny pills fell to the floor, to be ground to powder beneath her feet. She shook two into her hand, paused, then added another one. The almost empty pill bottle hit the wall with a sharp crack, and dropped into the open toilet. "Don't worry," she whispered, the sweet, coppery taste of blood from her bitten lip filling her mouth. "Don't worry, Haruka. I won't." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Yes, it's angst. What else did you expect from a Haruka/Michiru fic set in the mid-S season? A Technicolor musical? And no, Michiru didn't kill herself...they're just sleeping pills. Sheesh, some people. Comments, concerns, and other such things can be sent to gramarye@mailandnews.com. Gramarye July 20, 2000 http://gramarye.homepage.com