"Mercury Switch" by Devin de Gruyl (The insert-smartass-comment-here Kid) Part 3 ----- I have to admit, my fighting stance wasn't exactly Bruce Lee quality. More like "Beverly Hills Ninja," perhaps, but with less cellulite. Not that I was any master of fighting techniques anyway - my "style" has always been of the damn-the-torpedoes variety - but that, combined with my being in Ami's much smaller body, must have made me look quite ridiculous. But it seemed to have the desired effect anyway - at least at first. Mr. Muscle stopped his threatening advance... but, after he got a good look at me, he burst out in derisive laughter. "HAHAHAHAHA!!! Lookit THIS - l'il girl thinks she's a Sailor or somethin'!! That caught me off guard for a minute, and I relaxed my stance. Unfortunately, he took advantage of my momentary confusion. He grabbed my shoulders and pinned me against the wall. Hard. , I thought idly, as the giant loomed over me. "I've just about had it with you," he snarled, with an evil-looking grin on his face. He raised his fist. "Let's see ya magic your way outta THIS!" I did the only thing I could do. I kneed him in the... Um... let's just say "nether regions." His eyes rolled into the back of his head, as he bent over and tried to protect the most delicate part of the male anatomy from further harm. Seeing my chance, I delivered a weak-looking (but effective) karate chop to the back of his neck. He crumpled to the ground in a heap. After about a minute had passed, and I was convinced that he was neither about to get up or, if he was, he was in no danger of trying it again, I noticed that all the attention seemed to be focused on me. Every eye of every student on the grounds was looking at the aftermath. Suddenly self-conscious again, I tried to bid a hasty retreat... but not before my gaze met Lita's. To say she looked shocked would be the understatment of all time. --- A few minutes later, the bell rang to call the students back into the building. As I entered, I saw Lita coming up to talk to me. She looked at me, the surprise still evident on her face. "Ami... uh... I, ah, didn't know you had that in you..." "That's funny," I replied, "neither did I. But I guess you just never know what you're capable of until you're forced into a situation like that." "True enough, I guess... and hey - it's not like Masato didn't have that butt-whipping coming. The guy's nothing but a bully! But Ami... you've been acting weird ALL DAY so far! I'm starting to worry about you, and so's Serena..." "...I told you before, I'll say it again - there's nothing wrong with me. I just didn't get much sleep last night; too worried about finals coming up. And that guy just pushed me too far, so I dealt with him the only way he could understand it. That's ALL. Otherwise, I'm just fine." Lita seemed to accept this response, but I could tell she still had her doubts about it. "OK, Ames... if you say so..." I grinned. "Thanks, Lita. I knew you'd understand... you'll tell Serena too, right?" "Uh, sure." It was almost time for the start-of-class bell to ring. Lita started off, but I had one more nagging question, and (I felt) she was my only chance to get it answered. "Lita? One more thing..." She turned. "What's up?" I breathed a silent prayer that I wasn't about to make another faux pas with this question... as my inner voice was screaming I was. But I had to know - to satisfy my own curiosity if for no other reason. "When that guy was threatening me, and I started to fight back, he called me something. He said he thought I was a Sailor or something like that... do you know what he might have been talking about?" Y'know, it's funny, I never actually SAW somebody turn pure white before. I always thought that was just an expression. But that's exactly what happened to Lita when I asked. I could literally see the blood drain out of her face, leaving only a ghostly pallor. Her mouth opened and closed a few times, without saying much of anything. Then, softly, as if to herself, "...you're serious...you *don't* know...?" Now it was MY turn. "Lita? You all right?" "Huh? Oh! Yeah, sure, fine," she replied. She seemed to pull herself together now, and was speaking quickly, decisively. "Uh, look, I gotta run - talk to you later, OK? Bye!" With that, she was gone... leaving me with the feeling that, like a bad Jeopardy contestant, I'd just asked the wrong question. --- The rest of the day at school passed by uneventfully. To be blunt about it, I honestly don't remember any of it after my conversation with Lita in the hall. It was LONG, however, and somewhat boring; it was also (for me) punctuated with a distinct feeling of uncertainity. What hat started out to be a nightmare, then had taken a decided sense of "This could turn out to be fun after all," was now threatening to take another turn back to the dark side... and the worst was just around the corner. My next clear memory of this day came just as I was getting out of school. I didn't even know what time it was; it was LATE, that's all I knew. MUCH later than an American student like me was used to. I was walking along the streets, trying my best to retrace the way I came to school back to Ami's apartment building. I was no closer to finding out why or how I had gotten myself into this situation, much less to learning of a way back to my own body - wherever it was and whatever it was doing - than I was that morning, so it looked like Ami's home was gonna be my home for a bit longer. Just as I was starting to wonder what might happen if I *never* got my real body back (), I happened to notice what looked like a small comic-book shop situated on a corner. This is as good a place as any to break in and say a few words about my interests, I suppose. One of my greatest weaknesses in the world of pop-culture has always been comic book art. I love all styles of the form when it's done right, but I have a very special place in my heart for the Japanese artists. Back home - my REAL home, that is - my bedroom walls are decorated with posters featuring the work of some of the masters of the manga style, including Rumiko Takahashi and Akira Toriyama. So, when I saw a chance to see what wonders awaited my "fanboy" ("fangirl"?) eyes in a comic shop right here at the "source" (without even any markup for import taxes!), I just couldn't resist the opportunity. I rationalized. The store didn't seem all that different from the comic shops back home: glass display counter along one wall, the other walls lined with comic books, and various displays down the middle displaying sundry merchandise and paraphenallia - graphic novels, toys, and so on. And all (or nearly all) of it was anime- or manga-related, too! I had reached Nirvana, or so I believed... That's when I saw it, in one of the display cases. A vinyl model kit, preassembled, of five very strangely dressed girls. From the looks of it, they were wearing uniforms much like the sailor- look one I had on, but much skimpier versions thereof. They were skintight numbers that showed off enough bare skin to fuel the fantasies of most any of the guys I knew back home. The neckline on the collars were daringly low-cut, and the skirts were so short that I had to wonder why the designer even bothered to add them. Some of them wore knee-high boots, while others were apparently content to wear pumps and/or high heels. All of them had white gloves that reached their elbows, and they all had a sort of golden headband. None of these, however, are what made me stop and take notice. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but I knew I'd just found a VERY important piece to the puzzle. I called the guy behind the counter over, and asked about it. "You want that, it's 15,000 yen - but I can give you the kit for 9900." "Uh... n-no, Sir, I don't want to BUY it, I just want to ASK you about it, is all." He glared at me - obviously, I'd come to him on a bad day. "What do I look like, an information booth?! Look, kid, I just work here..." "All I wanted to know was what series these characters came from..." "What SERIES?" He started looking at me the same way a dog regards an unfamiliar visitor to the house. "Pardon me for asking, but what PLANET did you just beam in from?" "Huh?" "These girls... they're not characters, they're REAL PEOPLE. What, you never heard of the Sailor Soldiers?" A-*ha!* I KNEW I'd hit the jackpot! Now I could finally get some answers! "Actually... no, I hadn't. I'm... ah... new in town." "There something I should know about them?" His expression seemed to soften at that. "That's funny... coulda SWORN news about 'em was global by this time. Ah well... what can ya do? OK, sister, here's the deal: You know about the manga called 'Codename: Sailor V,' right?" "Yeah, of course." (Actually, I wasn't lying. I'd seen that title several times back home, but never really got into it. "Too much like kid stuff," I always thought... even though lots of other people swore by it.) "I thought you might. Anyway, about a year or so ago, there started to be a whole bunch of really WEIRD crimes being committed all around the district. I'm talking like right-out-of-the-Twilight-Zone kind of stuff. Reports of people having their 'life force' drained right out of them, or some BS like that... Crazy stuff, right?" I nodded, wondering where this was all leading. "Well, one night, this girl gets the idea to start doing something about all of this nonsense. She gets herself a costume that's right out of 'Sailor V,' starts busting down the doors of all the places where these things were happening, and the next thing you know, BLAMMO! No more bad guys! She called herself Sailor Moon - said she was Sailor V's partner the first couple of times she appeared, too. And, as the months went by, she started to get some other girls to help her out... they call themselves the 'Sailor Senshi' - I think it's supposed to mean 'Soldier' in this case, but the local media insists on calling them the 'Sailor Scouts,' for some reason. I dunno... Anyway, the more the Sailors kept appearing, the more of a fan following they seemed to get, and a whole bunch of merchandise for them started popping up all over the grey market. And that model's just an example. You see?" If the truth be known, I thought the guy was only about one short step removed from the psycho ward if he REALLY believed that crap - but I answered him in the affirmative. "Can I just take a look at it - y'know, out of the case, just for a second?" "Well... OK, but only because I think I like ya." He bent over to get the model out of the case. As soon as it was on the counter, I examined it VERY closely. I noticed that each of the individual Sailors had her own name etched on the base - each of them were named after different planets in the solar system, it seemed. (Well, except Sailor Moon herself, of course, but this didn't seem the place to argue that the Moon wasn't a planet per se.) I had the nagging feeling I'd seen at least Sailor Moon and Sailor Jupiter before... that is, *I* did, and not the intuition I'd come to rely on. That's what made it so strange. And then... my eyes fell on the one the model identified as "SAILOR MERCURY." What I saw made me gasp audibly. Unfortunately, the guy heard it. "Something wrong?" "Ah... ah... ah..." I stammered, trying to recover from the shock. "...n-n-no, I'm OK... I, ah, just noticed the TIME! I'm late! I gotta run - bye, thanks for the help -- I-I mean the story!" And I was GONE, out the door before he could manage a reply. --- Only once I was VERY far away from the store, and safely tucked away in an alley, did I dare to think about what I had seen in the model. The Sailor Mercury model had looked almost EXACTLY like Ami. Like *me.* I couldn't believe it. The implications of this... I would have progressed further down that road of thought, but a shrill beeping noise caught my full attention. It was coming from my bag, and a quick- and-dirty search of its contents revealed the culprit to be the organizer-thing I'd seen that morning. The one with the strange symbol on the cover. I thought, opening it. What I saw on the screen when I opened the case was not a dimly-lit reminder of something important. Rather, it was a bright, full-color, PICTURE. Specifically, a head shot of a girl with two long, blonde ponytails, that terminated on her head in a pair of hair buns that looked for all the world like big yellow meatballs. What's more, it SPOKE. "Ami," it said, "Where ARE you? Are you all right? What's wrong?" It took me a good ten seconds to realize that the voice was talking to ME, directly. This thing was a two-way communicator! (Yes folks, that's Darren McCormick for you - Mr. Quick-On-The-Draw.) "I'm, ah, in an alley, somewhere... can't quite make out the street from here." "Well, I'm just glad you're not dead!" Serena beamed from ear-to-ear with that realization. I only dimly noted the fact that my subconscious seemed to innately know her name, and that this was the "Serena" I'd heard about - and that this was the same girl whom Lita was talking to at lunch. I was more concerned with what she said. "*Dead?*" (For some reason, I felt myself grow cold at the very mention of the word... what's that expression, "like somebody just stepped on my grave" or something? That was the feeling.) "Yeah! Rei said, if *I* ever beat *you* to a meeting, you had to have fallen into an open manhole, or been hit by a falling construction beam, or something ELSE horrible like that! But you seem to be OK, thank God!" I honestly didn't know how to react to that. "Thanks" was the only thing I could think of. "Oh, you're welcome! But you'd better get over here - everybody's talking about you, and I think you should be here to hear it!" "Uh..." It dawned on me that I had no idea where Serena, nor the others, were! And then, it came to me in a rush of intuition. "Right. I'm on my way." "We're at the shrine, of course. On the corner of --" "SERENA!!!" That last came as a barely audible hiss on the other end of the line. Serena looked away from the "camera" for a minute, as if talking to somebody offscreen, then back at me. She laughed - a bit nervously, I thought. "Now WHY would I say a silly thing like that? You know where the shrine is, of course!" "Of course!" "Well, see ya in a few minutes then. Bye!" She cut the connection, and I was left staring at a blank screen. By this time, my theory about just what this "intuition" REALLY was had finally started to solidify in my mind... especially after how all this "vital information" had just COME to me out of thin air in the clutch. But that would come later. For now, I had a meeting to get to. --- My first thought upon arriving at the Hikawa Shrine (as the large stone pillar at its gateway proclaimed it to be) was, But it seemed I had no choice, so I trudged up what seemed like hundreds of stone steps, making my way to... well, whatever it was that awaited me at the top. By the time I'd reached the apex, I was sure that my legs would feel like lead weights... but they didn't. Obviously, Ami came here quite often; only extensive practice climbing those things could ensure that she (and now, it seemed, I) made it up here in such good condition. The shrine itself was quiet, almost peaceful. Save, however, for a room towards the rear of the structure, where by the sound of things a spirited conversation was ongoing. The sliding door was somewhat ajar, and as I approached, I began to make out snippets: A voice I recognized as Serena's. "...still haven't told me why you had to cut me off..." An unfamiliar, but loud, voice. "...don't want her to know... what if she's been taken over by..." Serena. "AMI? Never! She'd NEVER let them do that to her!" Voice, even louder. "God, Serena, what does it take to get through your skull?! Of COURSE she wouldn't LET them, but she MAY not have had a choice! Use your HEAD, for something besides a pasta dish!" Serena, sniffling. "...Oh, Rei, how can you SAY that about meee? You're so MEEEEEAAAAANNNN..." And with that, she segued into this tremendous wailing noise that could shatter glass three postal codes away! I held my ears and did all I could to keep from screaming myself, in agony! I'd never heard anything so loud in my life! When I dared listen again, I heard a new voice, another unfamiliar one. "Hmm... she starts crying at the twenty-five second mark. A new record, I do believe." Another new voice - this one I recognized as Lita. "You *still* keeping that score, Mina? I gave up months ago, just before Emerald showed up... now you wanna talk about annoying sounds..." By this time, I'd arrived at the door (somehow, with both ears and brain intact after Serena's "sonic boom"). As soon as I slid open the door, all conversation abruptly ceased. Four girls stared at me. Serena and Lita were two of them; the others were a classically beautiful blonde with a large red ribbon in her hair, and an intense-looking brunette, her face flushed from having just recently yelled at somebody. In addition, I noticed a pair of cats - a white one and a black one - perched by the windowsill. Even *they* seemed more than duly interested in me. Almost a full minute of awkward silence passed. Finally, I decided that I would have to be the one who broke the ice. I screwed on my best "problem?- WHAT-problem?" face, brightened, and asked, as nonchalantly as possible, "Hey guys! How's it going?" No one said anything. Lita continued to regard me with a gaze that I began to realize was somewhat less than friendly. Serena seemed to be searching for the right words to say. Finally, the brunette spoke. "Um... everything's fine, Ami. Come on in - we were just talking about you... right, everyone?" A chorus of "Yeah"s responded. I walked into the room, with no small amount of trepidation. "Ami, are you SURE you're feeling all right?" I looked around, but I couldn't find the person who'd said this. It was a new voice... but as I looked around, I only counted four others in the room, and I'd accounted for all of their voices. So either I'd made a mistake, or... "Ami?" And THAT was a MALE'S voice! Something was decidely amiss around here. I began glancing around, searching in vain for the source of the mysterious voices. "Ami? We're up here, on the windowsill." "But there's nobody... there..." I started to come to a sickening realization. "...except... for... the..." Cats. The cats were on the windowsill. And staring at me. And worst of all, TALKING to me. "This is just a guess," the white one said, "but I'm willing to bet you don't quite feel like yourself today. Am I close?" Talking cats. TALKING. CATS. I did what any other sane, rational human being would do in the same situation... I fainted. --- I woke up, and for a blissful minute thought the whole thing HAD been just a nightmare after all. But then my eyes opened, and I got a look at my surroundings... and at my body. *Her* body. I groaned. Somehow, I *knew* it wouldn't be that easy... but it never hurts to hold out hope, does it? It wasn't Ami's bedroom I was in this time, however; it was Rei's. Just as I thought, that knowledge came to me intuitively. But I didn't have time for that just now. Not with four pairs of eyes trained directly on me, waiting for me to show the first signs of life. "She's coming around, thank God," Serena said. "We can all SEE that," Rei replied testily. "Thanks for stating the obvious!" "Oh, shut UP! Can't I even be happy that my friend is OK without YOU -- " Luckily, Lita cut in before Serena could finish, and before Rei could even THINK of a snotty comeback. "Hey," she said - to me, I realized. "You back in the world of the living now?" I nodded, weakly. It was all I could do... The thing I hate most about fainting is that it takes a while for you to regain all your lost faculties, including speech. Lita "hmmm"ed quietly, almost to herself. Then, finally, she seemed to come to a decision. She looked at me square in the eye. "You'll be OK." Then, turning to the others: "I'd like a few minutes with her, if I could. Alone." Serena started to protest, but Rei cut her off. "No, Serena... she's right. We HAVE to know; and if Lita would rather handle it by herself..." "Which I do," Lita interrupted. "...then it's her call." The blonde ( as my inner guide helpfully identified her) agreed. "She's got a point, Serena. Hey; Lita's a big girl, she can take care of herself if things get ugly!" That seemed to mollify Serena a bit. After a brief delay, during which she no doubt considered everything she'd been told, she replied, "OK. But PROMISE me you'll call for help if..." Lita made a dismissive gesture, and smiled. "I'll be all right. Now go on, get outta here - if I've gotta do this, may as well get it over with." She made motions to "shoo" the others out of the room. After they'd left, Lita closed the door, and turned to face me, her expression implacable. Now, ever since it happened, I've never been quite sure why I decided to say what I did. I guess, subconsciously, I *wanted* Lita's help here. She struck me as the kind of person I could trust innately, someone who would actually believe my incredible story, even when I myself had a hard time accepting it (and I was the one LIVING it!). So, I decided to tell her the truth. I cleared my throat, and began. "Lita, I've got... something to tell you. You see, I --" "SHUT UP." "But I have to TELL you someth --" "I said SHUT UP!" There was no trace of friendship, no hint of camaraderie in that tone. Her gaze had turned steely, her face was flecked by sparks of hatred, and her words were laced with venom as she spoke. "The only thing I want outta you is some answers!" "Answers?" "You heard me, ANSWERS!" She crossed over to where I lay, still trying to gather my wits about me, and grabbed me by the neck. "For starters, you can tell me just what in the HELL YOU DID TO AMI, YOU BITCH!!?! And by GOD, you better tell me the TRUTH" - she tightened her grip on my windpipe - "or I'll crush your throat like a SODA CAN!" --- End of part 3. Author's Notes: I'll take this opportunity to thank some of the people who've gotten me started down the dark path of fanfic authorship 8^): * Chris Davies, whose outstanding stories are the standard by which all SM fanfics are judged. Would that my writing was only a TENTH as good as his. * Laura Hudson, for indirectly inspiring me to come up with my own ideas. You'll never know just how instrumental you've been in this, Laura... 8^) * Jennifer Allison Wand, for just being her own wonderful self. 8^) * All the folks on Undernet's #sailormoon channel - especially Daniel Amsler, Levar Bouyer, and Josh Smith, and even their respective "characters" (Lord Light, Jennifer "Sailor Orion" Sakachi, and Eimi "Sailor Centauri" Kozuka) - for motivating me to get an idea down on paper (well, "in a text editor" anyway). * Lastly, my thanks to you, the online fandom community. You're why it all happens! There are far more people to thank than this, of course, and I'll do so in the next part. Incidentally, "hit by a falling construction beam" (mentioned by Serena as one of Ami's possible fates when she was late for the meeting) was intended as a reference to a first-season episode - SM #27, or "Mercury's Mental Match"/23 for NA fans. At the beginning of that episode, you'll recall, our friend Ami nearly DID meet such a demise, and likely would have, had Greg/Urawa not fumbled his way through an introduction at just the right moment. And, in case there is somebody reading this wondering how much the model would have cost in U.S. dollars, there's a very simple rule of thumb for "guesstimating" a conversion from the Japanese yen - just divide by 100! That's all there is to it... so the model cost roughly $150 already assembled, and the kit went for about $99. (That's about the going rate for garage kits like that, BTW.) As always, however, your mileage may vary. Sailor Moon is TM and Copyright (C) 1992 Naoko Takeuchi / Kodansha / Toei Animation / Bandai. English Language Adaptation is Copyright (C) 1997 DIC Productions, L.P., a Division of the Walt Disney Corporation. All rights reserved. Any other trademarked entities used in this story are TM and Copyright (C) their respective owners. No claim of ownership, expressed or implied, is made in the use of these trademarked names, characters, and likenesses. The character of Darren McCormick and this story itself, however, are my own creations. Please don't sue me. I'm broke. 8^) - Devin de Gruyl May 1998