CWF RAW WEEK #29 RATING: TV-14 DVL E-MAIL: darkpowrjd@aol.com DISCLAIMER: You know THIS one! ______________________________________________________ ANNOUNCERS: Jim Ross Jerry "The King" Lawler King Kai BACKSTAGE: Lucas (from WWF.com) Kevin Kelly Michael Cole The New Guy RING ANN.: Lillian Garcia PLACE: Selland Arena in Fresno, Califonia WEB SITE: http://www.officialcwf.cjb.net ______________________________________________________ [begin RAW opening] SINGER:..................IT'S THE LIFE IN THE BOX THAT DRAWS TO ME!! TAKE THE JUMP, IN THE ARM IS THE SOUL OF ME!! REAL FAR, YOU WOULDN'T SEE ME LAYIN' FACE DOWN!! .......................... ...................................................ONE WOULD HAVE A THORN IN YOUR EYE!! [end RAW opening] After that, the people jammed in the Selland Arena in Fresno. After a full minute of this, JR starts the commentary. JR: LAST NIGHT, WE CROWNED A NEW CWF WORLD CHAMPION, AND THEN SOME!! NO WAY OUT WAS A MONUMENTOUS PAY PER VIEW, AND SOME QUESTIONS MUST BE ANSWERED HERE TONIGHT!! WE ARE LIVE HERE IN THE SELLAND ARENA IN FRESNO, CALIFONIA!! JIM ROSS ALONGSIDE JERRY THE KING LAWLER AND KING KAI, AND TONIGHT, FOLKS, THINGS ARE GOING TO HEAT UP... BG: ONE, TWO, IS THIS ON!! KING: AND HERE COMES THE FORMER CWF CHAMIPION WHO GOT SCREWED LAST NIGHT AT NO WAY OUT!! KAI: WELL, CERTAINLY, HE DESHERVED IT!! SHAILOR MOON ISH THE NEW CWF CHAMPION, AND THAT CERTANILY HASH CREATED A WHIRLPOOL OF CONTREVERSHY!! JR: IT CERTANLY HAS, KAI!! AND THIS MAN HAS GOT TO BE THE START OF WHAT IS TO BE ONE HELLATIOUS NIGHT OF RAW!! KING: THESE FANS HAVE NO RESPECT FOR THE GAME!! DON'T THEY SEE THAT HE WAS SCREWED OUT OF THE TITLE LAST NIGHT?! JR: QUEEN SERENITY DEFINITLY HELPED OUT IN THE MATCH, I CAN AMIT THAT MUCH, BUT HE GOT WHAT WAS COMING TO HIM.. CROWD: ASSHOLE, ASSHOLE, ASSHOLE!! KING: THERE THEY GO!! JR: THESE FANS WITH THAT DISPLEASURE OF THE GAME!! KAI: HE ISH ONE!! THAT I KNOW!! HHH: LAST NIGHT!! A CRIME WAS COMMITTED!! A CRIME WAS SOLEY COMMITTED!! LAST NIGHT, IN TORONTO, I WAS GOING ALL OUT, AND WAS BEATING DOWN ON THOSE TWO SAILOR BITCHES THAT WERE IN THE RING!! WHEN THAT QUEEN SLUT CAME OUT AND GOT IN THE BUSINESS OF THE GAME!! KING: HE IS NOT IN A GOOD MOOD, JR!! HHH: BUT NOT ONLY DID I LOSE TO A SAILOR BITCH!! NO!! I LOSE IT WITHOUT EVEN BEING PINNED!! I LOSE IT TO THE BIGGEST BITCH ON THAT TEAM, SAILOR MOON!! Crowd cheers. JR: The fans know that one, and like it!! HHH: SAILOR MOON, SERENA, PRINCESS WHORE, ORDANGO-ASS,... JR: UH OH!! HHH: WHATEVER YOU CALL YOURSELF!! YOU WON'T GET VERY FAR WITH THAT TITLE, BECAUSE YOU WILL BE FACING THE GAME AGAIN PRETTY SOON!! BUT TONIGHT!! KAI: HERE WE GO!! HHH: TONIGHT, IN FRESNO, I AM HERE TO TALK DIRECTLY TO YOU, QUEEN SLUT!! KING: UH OH!! JR: QUEEN SERENITY IS WHO HE'S REFERRING TO, AND WE CAN CALL HE QUEEN!! SHE WON THE EVERYTHING OR NOTHING MATCH LAST NIGHT!! HHH: SERENITY, YOU ARE NOTHING BUT A PEON!! A NOBODY, TO THE GAME!! IN MY EYES, YOU ARE NOTHING MORE THAN A SLUT AND IT WILL STAY THAT WAY FOR ALL TIME!! KING: HE MEANS IT TO!! HHH: BUT THERE WAS SOMETHING THAT I WAS INFORMED OF TONIGHT!! I WAS INFORMED THAT SOMEONE WAS IN THE BUILDING THAT HASN'T BEEN IN THE BUILDING FOR A LONG, LONG TIME!! KAI: WAIT A MINUTE!! JR: WHO IS IT?! HHH: AND I WAS HEARING ALL OF THIS ABOUT THE CEO, DARKPOWER, COMING INTO FRESNO TONIGHT... JR: OH NO!! KAI: JUSHT WHEN I THOUGHT THAT HE WOULDN'T COME BWACK!! HHH: AND I HEAR THAT HE IS GOING TO DO SOME THINGS HERE... All of a sudden, Sailor Mars' music starts playing. KING: WAIT A MINUTE!! JR: What does Sailor Mars have to do with any of this?! KAI: I don't know, bwut I would like to find out. MARS: TRIPLE H, IT SEEMS THAT I AM NOT ALONE ANYMORE!! JR: What?! KING: I don't know!! MARS: IT SEEMS THAT BOTH YOU AND I HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!! AND THAT IS THAT WE ARE BOTH ANGRY THAT SAILOR MOON, AND YES, SHE IS NOTHING BY A GOD DAMN ORDANGO-ASS!! KING: OH NO!! MARS: I AM ALSO ANGRY THAT SHE IS THE CWF CHAMPION, JUST AS MUCH AS YOU ARE, GAME!!! JR: UH OH!! KING: I WAS AFRAID THAT THIS WAS GONNA HAPPEN!! KAI: SHAILOR MARSH ISH THE FIRSHT ONE TO SHAY SHOMETHING ABWOUT IT, SHOMETHING THAT I THINK WILL HAPPEN TO THE RESHT OF THE SHAILORSH!! HHH: OKAY!! SO WHAT YOU ARE SAYING THAT TONIGHT, YOU AGREE THAT SAILOR MOON IS A TOTAL BITCH THAT DOESN'T DESERVE THE TITLE?! MARS: THAT IS RIGHT, AND SEEING THAT THE HELMSLY-MCMAHON ERA IN ALIVE AND KICKING IN THE CWF... JR: WAIT A MINUTE!! KING: WHAT IS SHE WANTING?! MARS: I WAS THINKING THAT WHEN THAT MATCH WITH JUPITER IS DONE, YOU GIVE ME A TITLE SHOT HERE TONIGHT AGAINST WHOEVER WINS!! AND I WANT IT TO BE SAILOR MOON, BECAUSE I WANT TO HAVE THAT PLEASURE TO FINALLY GIVE THAT BITCH EXACTLY WHAT HAS BEEN COMING TO HER!! JR: SHE WANTS A TITLE SHOT HERE TONIGHT?! KAI: WHAT IT SHOULDSH LIKE TO ME!! HHH: HEY, MARS, DON'T LET ME STOP YOU FROM KICKING HER ORDANGO-ASS FROM PILLAR TO POST, BUT... Sailor Moon's music starts, and she comes out CWF Title belt in hand. JR: Wait a minute, here comes the CWF Champion. KING: And SHE has the mic!! MOON: Well, well, well!! Look what we have here. Two people that are angry because I just happnened to win!! MARS: YOU SHUT UP, YOU NO GOOD, TWO TIMING, BACKSTABBING ORDANGO-ASS!! JR: WOW!! MARS: NOW THAT I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION!! I KNEW WHO YOU WERE FROM THE VERY BEGINNING, SERENA!! I KNEW THAT YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN WANTING TO TRY TO BRING SAILOR MOON INTO THE SHOW!! I KNEW THAT YOU WANTED TO TRY TO GET INTO THE SPOTLIGHT!! JR: UH OH!! MARS: BUT NOW IT ISN'T GOING TO WORK, IS IT!! IT ISN'T GONNA GO AS YOU PLANNED, BECAUSE YOU SEE, THIS IS MY SHOW NOW!! THESE ARE THE PEOPLE WHO SUPPORT ME, NOT YOU!! Crowd boos in disagreement. JR: I don't think that sat too well with these fans. Sold out crowd here, on their feet here. MARS: I REALLY HOPE THAT YOU CAN KICK LITA'S ASS HERE TONIGHT, JUST SO THAT I CAN FACE YOUR ASS, BECAUSE WHEN I WIN THAT BELT, I WILL WANT TO WIN IT FROM YOU, YOU LAZY BITCH... With that, SHE SLAPS SAILOR MOON DEAD CENTER, HARD IN THE FACE!! JR: OH MAN!! KING: She just slapped the taste right out of Moon's MOUTH, JR!! KAI: I FELT that one!! MARS: How did you... 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 0!! JR: WAIT A MINUTE!! WHAT NOW?! KING: WHAT DOES Y2J HAVE TO DO WITH ANY OF THIS?! BOOOOMM!! BG: YOU KNOW I GOT YA!! YEAH, ONE!! BREAK THE WALL DOOOWWWWWNNNNNN!!! FOR THOSE WHO LIKE TO ROCK, WHAT YA WANT!! AND YOU KNOW YOUR JUDAS, AND I'M YOUR PRIEST... JERICHO: FRESNO, WELCOME TO [w/ crowd] RAW IS JERICHO!! He then apears on the stage, while the Sailors are in front of the ring now, and his music stops. JR: Why is Chris Jericho OUT here?! JERICHO: You know, I was listening backstage, at Sailor Mars running her lips about how she dislikes Sailor Moon being the CWF Champion. Well, I'm disliking something MYSELF, which is her RUNNING HER MOUTH, WITH HER AND HER CAVEMAN LANGUAGE!! KING: UH OH!! JERICHO: I think that you might have forgotten, Mars, about OUR little mix up a while back. And let me be the FIRST to congragulate you on me spicing up an otherwise BORING, uninteresting match of YOURS, because that was the ONLY match that people actually STAYED to see. JR: UH OH!! JERICHO: Now you come out here and bore us to death with your never ending speeches. Now, I've been in a match with Moon before, or whatever she wants to call herself. I prefer to call her ONE BAD MAMMA JAMMA!! She is someone that you do not want to mess with!! In fact, how about you tell me how bad you want it. HHH: HOLD ON, JERICHO!! YOU GAVE ME AN IDEA!! HOW ABOUT TONIGHT, IF SAILOR MARS CAN BEAT THIS GOOF IN FRONT OF US TONIGHT, THEN SHE CAN HAVE THAT TITLE SHOT AGAINST WHOEVER HAS THE TITLE, LATER TONIGHT IN THIS VERY RING!! JR: SAILOR MARS AND Y2J CHRIS JERICHO!! JERICHO: AND PERSONALLY, I'M NOT TOO WORRIED ABOUT THE WORLD TITLE, SO I'M NOT GONNA WORRY ABOUT GETTING A SHOT, BECAUSE SHE CAN KEEP IT FOR ALL I CARE!! BUT THERE WILL COME A DAY IN WHICH I WILL GET A SHOT A THAT THING... HHH: WELL THEN, LET'S EVEN THE ODDS!! IF YOU WIN, Y2J, YOULL GET THAT TITLE SHOT TONIGHT!! JR: OH MY!! WHAT A BOMBSHELL THAT IS TONIGHT!! Y2J VS. SAILOR MARS, AND THE WINNER TO MEET THE WINNER OF THE MOON VS. JUPITER TITLE MATCH LATER TONIGHT FOR THE TITLE!! KING: TWO TITLE MATCHES IN ONE NIGHT!! KAI: THE FIRE SHAILOR AGAINSHT THE AYOTOLA OF ROCK AND ROLL-A!! JERICHO: I AM UP FOR THAT, AND TO MOON, NOTHING AGAINST YOU, BUT WHEN I AM THOUGH WITH SAILOR MARS, I AM COMING TO YOU, AND YOU WILL NEVER.....EEEEEEEEVER WILL WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER SOUND OF Y2J, AGAIEN!! [his music plays] JR: SO TONIGHT, IT IS GOING TO BE SAIOR MOON VS. SAILOR JUPITER FOR THE CWF TITLE, AND THE WINNER WILL MET THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH!! SAILOR MARS AND CHRIS JERICHO!! WHAT A NIGHT WE HAVE THUS FAR, AND WHAT A GREAT WAY TO START OFF RAW ONE DAY REMOVED FROM NO WAY OUT, KINGS! KING: AND LISTEN TO THIS, TONIGHT, ARI HAS A SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT HERE TONIGHT!! WHAT IS IT?! KAI: AND GET THISH, THE ROCK AND TALPA ARE HERE, AND AFTER THE ROCK WON THE BWATTLE OF THE SHUPERHEAVYWEIGHTSH LAST NIGHT, SHOMETHING TELLSH ME THAT TALPA CANNOT BWE HAPPY ABWOUT THOSHE TURN OF EVENTSH ONE LITTLE BWIT!! JR: AND PLUS, WE WILL HAVE AN UPDATE ON NAPPA, WHO AT THE HANDS OF THE BIG SHOW GOT RAN OVER BY A CAR LAST NIGHT, GOT SOME BROKEN BONES AND FRACTURED RIBS!! THAT WAS THE REASON FOR THE ROCK EVEN BEING IN THE SUPERHEAVYWEIGHTS MATCH IN THE FIRST PLACE!! KING: PLUS, GOKU, GOHAN, ASH, AND SAGE ARE ALL HERE, AS WELL AS EVERYONE THAT WAS INVOLVED LAST NIGHT AT NO WAY OUT ARE HERE TONIGHT!! Switch to the bck, where Talpa is coming out. KING: And here comes the big man. JR: He's got a lot of answering to do when we come back. We want some questions answered from that man. [start CWF promo] All of a sudden...A CAR RAMS HIM IN THE MIDSECTION, CAUSING HIM TO GET FLOWN 5 FEET IN THE AIR, AND BACK ONTO THE GROUND HARD!! JR: WAIT A MINUTE!! MY GOD, THAT CAR JUST HIT NAPPA DEAD ON,...IT WAS THE BIG SHOW!! Talpa gets back up and...HITS THE ROCK FROM BEHIND!! ...KING: TALPA IS ANGRY!! ....JR: THE ROCK, SET UP....TALPADRIVER, AND THESE FANS DON'T SEEM TO LIKE THAT TURN OF EVENTS ONE LITTLE BIT, EITHER!! ...JR: QUEEN SERENITY IS GOING AFTER THE GAME!...MOON AND MERCURY, AND THEY ARE SLU... THE...RUNNING POWERBOMB, 1.......2.......3!!! WE'VE GOT OUR BRAND NEW CHAMPION!! ANN: Relive the night. CWF No Way Out, the encore presentation, tommorrow night, and only on Pay Per View. [end CWF promo] They then go to a break, then come back. [start CWF promo] The scene is on an elevator. Standard elevator music is playing. Gohan is standing on the left, holding a bag of Sonic Sour Cream Doritos. The doors open, and Ash walks in, holding a bag of Baja Picante Doritos. He nods in acknowledgement of Gohan. ANN.: Which is louder, New Baja Picante Doritos? Ash eats one of his Doritos, and suddenly, Latin music fills the elevator. They look at the one speaker in shock. ANN.: Or New Sonic Sour Cream? Gohan eats one of his Doritos, and loud rock and roll music replaces the Latin music. He starts banging his head to it. Ash retorts by eating another one of his, and the Latin music is back. He starts dancing to the music. The two duke it out in such fashion, until they BOTH eat a Dorito at the same time. Here, the music gets REALLY screwed up, the elevator starts going up and down rapidly, electricity floods the elevator, as well as flying Doritos. ASH & GOHAN: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! The speaker explodes just as another passenger is about to board. The doors open, and Ash is trembling violently, and Gohan collapses on the floor. ANN.: New louder Doritos. Now seven wild ways to get your daily dose of LOUD. [end CWF promo] They come back to ringside, and Talpa's music comes on, and he comes out to a now mixed crowd. JR: WELCOME BACK TO CWF RAW!! KAI: THAT WASH A GOOD COMMERCIAL, GUYS!! KING: AND I THOUGHT THAT THEY LIKED RAP AND THAT SORT OF STUFF!! JR: WELL, ALL THAT ASIDE, WE NEED TO GET SOME QUESTIONS ANSWERED BY TALPA HERE TONIGHT!! KAI: Definitly do. Why did he do what he did to The Rock lasht night?! KING: The Rock wasn't even SCEDUALED to be in TORONTO, much less the match itself last night. JR: Talpa gets the mic!! We are about to find OUT what is going on here. TALPA: So, you guys want an explination as to why I attacked the Rock last night in Toronto. You really are wanting an explination!! Well, here's one. THE ROCK SUCKS!! HOW'S THAT FOR ONE?! Crowd boos. JR: WOW!! KING: I guess THAT is a pretty good reason. TALPA: Needless to say, I do not LIKE the Rock...no, I HATE THE ROCK, AS WELL AS I HATE KISSING BABIES EVERYWHERE I GO!! KING: WAIT A MINUTE!! KAI: What ish he talking abwout?! TALPA: I think that it's time to you to find out my TRUE purpose in the CWF!! I am going to use this as my base of attack to all of the superstars in the CWF!! Tonight, I am gonna arise the dark spirits, so [the lights go black]... JR: What the hell is all of this?! KAI: I don't like the looksh of thish!! KING: Me either, JR!! What IS he doing?! TALPA: I want all of the dark spirits to arise, ARISE, ARRIIISSSEEE!! AND TAKE OVER... The lights come back on for some reason. JR: UH OH!! TALPA: What is going... BG: IF YA SMMMEEEEEEELLLLLLL....WHAT THE ROCK....IS COOKIN'!! JR: WAIT A MINUTE!! KING: THE ROCK IS ON THE TITANTRON, JR!! KAI: HE'SH GONNA ANSHWER THE GUY WHO ISH DOING SHOME SHTANGE SHTUFF IN THISH RING!! ROCK: .......FINALLLY, THE ROCK, HAS COME BACK, TO FRESSSNOOO!! [turns head sharply to look at Talpa. Crowd cheers] JR: These fans LOVE the Rock. ROCK: Talpa, The Rock says this. The Rock was in the back, saying that last night, he was, without a shadow OF A DOUBT the best damn CWF Superheavyweight that this industry has EVER seen. Sure, he's not 500 pounds, 7 foot, and goes....AADDDDDDUUUUUUEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!! But he kiked their candy asses to pillar to post!! He was saying all of that monkey crap. And here YOU are. 6 foot, 400 pounds. And you are out here, and what do YOU say?! You say THIS!! [in a Talpa-insulting style mocking voice] AURISE, AURISE, AURISE!! DUARK SPUIRITS, AURISE, BUECAUSE WUITOUT YUOU, I WUOULD WUITHOUT A SHUADOW OF A DUOUBT, I WUOULD [slowinly coming back to the Rocks normal voice] AUUUABSOLUTLY SUCK!! Crowd cheers. Talpa is now IRATE!! KING: THE ROCK HAS A DEATH WITH, JR!! ROCK: TALPA... COWD: ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY... ROCK: TALPA, THE ONLY THING THAT THOSE DARK SPIRITS ARE GOING TO DO FOR YOU IS TO SEAL YOUR FATE, AND THAT IS TO OFFICIALLY MAKE YOU WHAT THE ROCK AND THE MILLIONS... CROWD:...AND MILLIONS!! ROCK:...OF THE ROCK'S FANS HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT OF YOU, WHICH IS THAT YOU ARE A 6 FOOT, 400 POUND GRADE A PIECE OF MONKEY CRAP!! KING: WOW!! ROCK: SO THE ROCK IS TRYING TO SAY THAT TONIGHT, HE IS GOING TO DO THIS ONE THING, AND THAT THING IS GOING TO BE...AT WRESTLEMANIA!! JR: UH OH!! ROCK: TALPA, YOU 400 POUND PIECE OF RATARDED MONKEY CRAP, THE ROCK IS GOING TO TAKE YOU AND ALL OF YOUR DARK SPIRITS INTO FLORIDA, AND THEN HE IS GOING TO ARISE SOMETHING OF HIS OWN!! HE IS GOING TO TAKE THOSE DARK SPIRITS, PCK THEM ALL NICE AND TIGHT, THEN HE WILL TRUN THEM SIDEWAYS, AND RISE ALL OF THEM STRAIGHT UP YOUR CANDY ASS, AND THEN LAY THE BIGGEST SMACK DOWN THAT YOUR 4 FOOT, 400 POUND BIG FAT CANDY ASS, HAS EVER SEEN!! KING: THE ROCK IS LAYNG THE VERBAL SMACK DOWN, BUT IS HE SERIOUS ABOUT WRESTLEMANIA?! ROCK: IF YOU SMEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLALALALALALALALOWWWW....WHAT THE ROCK!! CROWD:...IS COOKIN'!! He does the People's Eyebrow. They are cheering like nothing FRESNO has ever seen. ROCK:.................................................................. ...............................................IS COOKIN'!! [his music plays] JR: THE ROCK HAS CHALLENGED TALPA TO A MATCH AT WRESTLEMANIA!! KAI: SHOMETHING TELLSH ME THAT THISH WILL NOT BWE PWRETTY IF HE ACCEPTSH THAT CHALLENGE!! JR: Coming up next, Ari will have that announcement. What is this going to be. That is next. They go to a break, then come back. BG: OOOOOOOOO, OOOOOOO-OOOOOOOO, OOOO-OOOOO-OOOOO-OOOOOOOOOO...WE'VE GOT STARS DIRECTING OUR FATE, AND WE PRAY THAT IT'S NOT TOO LATE, (MILLENNIUM) SOME SAY THAT WE ARE PLAYERS, SOME SAY THAT WE ARE PAWNS, BUT WE'VE BEEN MAKING MONEY SINCE THEY DAY THAT WE WERE BORN, GOT TO SLOW DOWN (SLOW DOWN, SLOW DOWN) BEFORE WE FALL DOWN! Ari enters, carrying a title belt on white leather. The crowd is cheering him on. JR: Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for Ari's big anouncement. KING: What's that in his hand, JR? JR: It looks like a title belt, King! KAI: I've never sheen THAT bwelt before, guysh! Is it a new title? KING: Maybe one of the old belts got reconditioned! Ari enters the ring. ARI: IT IS A PROUD DAY FOR ALL OF US IN THE CWF! Crowd cheers. ARI: TODAY MARKS THE BEGINNING...OF A NEW TITLE, EXCLUSIVELY TO THE CARTOON WRESTLING FEDERATION! Crowd cheers further. KING: A NEW TITLE?! I KNEW IT! KAI: WHAT'SH HE MEAN BWY EXCLUSHIVE?! ARI: THIS IS NO JOKE! THIS IS NO RUSE! ONLY IN THE CWF WILL YOU SEE THIS TITLE DEFENDED! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I GIVE TO YOU...THE CARTOON WRESTLING FEDERATION...SOUTH EAST ASIAN CHAMPIONSHIP TITLE! He holds the belt high as an ecstatic crowd responds. JR: OH MY! THE SOUTH EAST ASIAN CHAMPIONSHIP BELT! KING: INCREDIBLE! Darkpower's music starts up, and he appears on the stage. You know what the fans are doing to him. KAI: Thish ish JUSHT what we need to shpoin the mood now! CROWD'S CHANTS: ASSHOLE...ASSHOLE...ASSHOLE...ASSHOLE...! KING: WON'T THESE PEOPLE EVER LEARN, JR?! DP: SHUT UP! [Fans boo more.] ARI, WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! I MEAN, JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE THE PRESIDENT, THAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO MAKE A NEW TITLE, JUST FOR YOUR OWN AMUSEMENT?! ARI: I WAS GONNA ASK YOU THE SAME THING, WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE NEARLY SENDING AN 11-YEAR-OLD BOY TO HIS GRAVE AT THE RUMBLE, HUH?! Crowd boos at DP, but is cheering for Gohan at the same time. KING: I DON'T NEED TO BE REMINDED OF THAT MATCH, JR! JR: LIKEWISE! ARI: WELL, THANKS TO A LITTLE HELP FROM THE GREEN KNIGHT, WE HAVE SANCTIONED THIS TITLE, EXCLUSIVELY TO THE CWF! NOW STAND BACK, AND WATCH AS I, ARI... Crowd cheers. ARI: ...MAKE HISTORY! [Cut to the Titantron.] WHAT YOU SEE NOW ON THE TITANTRON IS THE BRACKETS FOR THE S.E.A. TITLE TOURNAMENT! I WILL NOW FILL THEM OUT NOW, STARTING WITH THE BOTTOM TWO SEEDS! DP: What's your game, Hamilton? ARI: MY GAME?! FIRST OFF, THE NAME'S ARI! SECOND OFF, I'M JUST GONNA ANSWER A QUESTION THAT'S BEEN BUGGING US FOR A LONG TIME! KAI: Which would bwe? ARI: AND THAT IS, WHICH ONE OF YOUR TWO POKEMON LACKIES IS BETTER...TODD OR BROCK! THOSE TWO WILL ANSWER THAT QUESTION IN FIRST ROUND COMPETITION! JR: Should be an interesting matchup! ARI: AND...IF THEY DON'T WANT TO FIGHT EACH OTHER, THEN THEY CAN JUST BOTH FOREFIT THE MATCH, AND GIVE EITHER VEGETA OR HIS *MYSTERY OPPONENT* A BYE RIGHT INTO THE FINALS! Crowd cheers. KING: THAT'S NOT RIGHT, JR! KAI: MORE IMPORTANTLY, WHO'SH GONNA BWE THE MYSHTERY OPPONENT?! ARI: NOW THEN...ON THE OTHER SIDE, WE WILL HAVE RONIN WARRIOR RYO OF THE WILDFIRE TAKE ON SAILOR MARS! KING: OHH! ARI: AND THE WINNER OF THAT MATCH CAN HAVE THE WINNER OF DARIEN "TUXEDO MASK" CHIBA... Ari pauses. JR: And who? DP: Who's Tuxedo Mask gonna have to go th- ARI: OR GOHAN!! Crowd goes CRAZY! JR: OH MY! LAWLER: WHAT?! ARI: AND THE FINALS.....AND THE FINALS OF THE TOURNAMENT WILL TAKE PLACE AT WRESTLEMANIA 2000! His music hits. JR: WHAT AN ANOUNCEMENT FROM THE PRESIDENT! A NEW TITLE! A HUGE TOURNAMENT! THIS IS GONNA BE HUGE! KING: NO WAY, AND SAILOR MARS IS GOING TO HAVE A WORLD TITLE MATCH RIGHT HERE TONIGHT IF SHE CAN GET PAST Y2J, CHRIS JERICHO!! JR: OR WILL IT BE Y2J TO GET A TITLE SHOT... Switch to the back, where DX is IRATE of what they just heard. TODD: YOU MEAN WE HAVE TO FIGHT EACH OTHER, MAN!! BROCK: I GUESS THAT'S WHAT THAT ASSHOLE WANTS US TO DO!! COME ON!! WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING TO STOP THIS RAMPAGE!! WE'RE DOING THE MATCH NOW!! COME ON!! They leave. JR: The match is tonight, and it is NEXT!! They go to a break, then come back. The DX theme starts up. JR: Ladies and gentlemen, we are now going to begin this history making tournament for the CWF South East Asian Championship! A title exCLUSIVELY to the Cartoon Wrestling Federation! KING: Yeah, but I STILL can't believe that nut Ari for doing this to Todd and Brock! They're BOTH part of DX! It isn't right! KAI: Ash and Gohan fight each other LOTSH of timesh! And they LOVE it! BG: BREAK IT DOWN! JR: Well as we know Ash and Gohan enjoy a great fight just as much as anybody, regardless of who the oppent is! And now - (Todd and Brock enter, Todd with his arm in a sling, and Brock with his wrist heavily padded and taped up.) what is THIS?! KAI: GIMME A BWEAK! KING: I KNOW, RIGHT?! These two SHOULDN'T have to fight in the condition there in! JR: That's not the reason I was looking for! I smell a rat! They enter the ring. Todd has a mic. TODD: TONIGHT... CROWD'S CHANTS: BULLLL-SHIT! BULLLL-SHIT! BULLLL-SHIT! BULLLL-SHIT! KAI: My shentimentsh exactly! TODD: Just hear us out first, people. NOW WE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE COMPETING AGAINST EACH OTHER TO SEE WHO WILL ADVANCE IN THE SEA TOURNAMENT! NOW AS BADLY AS WE WANT TO MAKE HISTORY, BY BECOMING THE FIRST SEA CHAMPION, I'M AFRAID THAT...WE CAN'T. SO- BG: FORTUNE, FAME...MIRROR, VEIN...GONE INSANE, BUT THE MEMORY REMAAAAAAAAINS!!! GK enters. GK: JUST A DAMN MINUTE! He heads down the ring. GK: NOW I SPEAK FOR ALL THESE PEOPLE ON HAND WHEN I SAY THAT THIS LITTLE DISPLAY YOU TWO ARE PUTTING ON IS...UH...WHAT WAS THAT YOU WERE CHANTING? CROWD'S CHANTS: BULLLL-SHIT! BULLLL-SHIT! BULLLL-SHIT! BULLLL-SHIT! KING: WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE, JR?! GK: NOW IF YOU TWO WERE INJURED, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN ARI OR ME, AND GIVEN ME YOUR MEDICAL REPORTS. NOW WHERE ARE THEY?! TODD: Uh...uh...TRIPLE H HAS THEM! BROCK: Y-yeah! They're on the bus! TODD: Yeah! On the DX Express parked out back! BROCK: The bus is out back! Should we- TODD: You want us to go get 'em? GK shakes his head. GK: NO, no, no, for once, I'll take your word on this. See, hanging out with Triple H and DX all the time, I'll assume that you are RESPONSIBLE young men. Todd and Brock sigh in relief. JR: This is different. KING : See? ARI believes them! Why can't you?! GK: THINK FAST! GK dishes the mic as hard as he can at Brock. He bumbles it with BOTH hands, and Todd catches it in the hand on his bad arm. The crowd cheers in disgust. KING: WHAT?! GK: JUST WHAT I THOUGHT! YOU TWO ARE IN GOOD ENOUGH SHAPE TO COMPETE HERE TONIGHT! NOW YOU TWO HAVE A CHOICE: EITHER YOU TWO FIGHT IT OUT HERE, WHERE THERE MUST BE A WINNER NO MATTER WHAT...OR I'LL KICK BOTH YOUR ASSES AND TAKE YOUR SPOT IN THE SEMIFINALS! Crowd cheers louder. JR: OH MY! WHAT AN ANOUNCEMENT BY THE PRESIDENT OF THIS COMPANY! KAI: YEAH! KING: THIS ISN'T RIGHT! JR: AND HERE WE GO! THIS MATCH IS UNDERWAY! TODD AND BROCK SLUGGING IT OUT HERE! GK goes and sits next to JR. He puts on a headset. GK: Good evening gentlemen! JR: We are now being joined by the Green Knight, the Commissioner of the CWF, for some color commentary! GK: This team's colorful enough; look at that outfit the King has on! KING: HEY! JR: Back to the matchup, Todd has Brock on the ropes, Irish whip to the far side, and there's a knee right to the sternum of Brock! Brock back up, snapmare takeover now, rear chinlock applied... KING: What kind of sick prank is this that Ari put on? GK: Prank? KING: Precisely! These two shouldn't have to be - AAAH! JR: TODD JUST GOT CLOTHESLINED RIGHT OVER THE TOP ROPE RIGHT OUT IN FRONT OF US! KING: THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE TO BE FIGHTING EACH OTHER! GK: YEAH, YOU MENTIONED THAT! (Todd starts talking smack at Ari.) YEAH, GET BACK IN THE RING, SON! I'M-A SLAP THE YELLOW OFF YOUR TEETH AND THE GINGIVITIS OFF YOUR GUMS! KAI: I'D PAY TO SHEE THAT! JR: OOO! TODD'S HEAD BOUNCED RIGHT OFF OUR ANOUNCE POSITION! They're now back in the ring, Todd now...BIG PILEDRIVER by Todd, and... The camera pans to a full shot of the ring, where a very fat man, dressed in a cutoff white T-shirt, ripped short shorts, a blue pony tail, and eye makeup resembling sunglasses. He starts dancing. JR: Hey, wait - that...THAT'S THE BLUE MEANIE! KAI: (as the Meanie attacks Todd & Brock) HE DOESHN'T EVEN WRESHTLE FOR THE CWF, THISH ISH SHOME JOKER FROM EVW! LOOK AT THAT BWELLY! JR: THE BLUE MEANIE - GK: That fat disgusting pig. GK drops his headset, and heads to the ring. He attacks the Blue Meanie. JR: GK HAS LEFT OUR ANOUNCE POSITION, AND HE'S GOING AFTER THE MEANIE! THE MEANIE...KNOCKED TO THE OUTSIDE! AND NOW GK... Todd and Brock just look at GK. Then GK dismantles both of them. KING: AAAAH! JR: THE GREEN KNIGHT NOW GOING AFTER TODD AND BROCK! A MEETING OF THE MINDS BY GK! GK TO THE TOP ROPE...THERE IT IS! THE GREEN HANGOVER ON TODD! GK NOW WITH BROCK - JACKNIFE POWERBOMB! COVER ON BOTH, GK DIRECTING THE REFEREE, 1...2...3! The bell sounds. KAI: WHAT DOESH THISH MEAN, JR?! GK: OKAY, HERE'S THE DEAL! NOW IT SEEMS THAT SINCE THESE TWO WERE SO RELUCTANT TO FIGHT HERE TONIGHT, I HAVE DECIDED THAT NEITHER ONE OF THEM WILL GO TO THE SEMI-FINALS! SO THE WINNER OF THIS MATCH, AND THE MAN WHO WILL FACE EITHER VEGETA OR THE MYSTERY OPPONENT IS...THE GREEN KNIGHT! His music picks up. KING: THIS ISN'T RIGHT! JR: THE GREEN KNIGHT ADVANCES IN THE TOURNAMENT, AFTER DEFEATING BOTH TODD AND BROCK OF D-GENERATION X! KAI: TRIPLE H CAN'T BE PLEASHED WITH THISH! KING: THIS IS A SCAM! THIS IS A SETUP, JR! JR: YEAH, AND THAT IS JUST TOO DAMN BAD, IS IT!! Switch to the back, where Sailor Moon is coming out for the title match. JR: Well, coming up next, it's going to be the CWF World Title match, the first of two tonight. Whoever wins this one will face the winner of the following matchup, Sailor Mars vs. Y2J!! THAT MATCHUP IS NEXT!! They go to a break, then come back. Sailor Jupiter's music starts, and she comes out. JR: And here comes the challenger for the CWF title. It's going to be Sailor Jupiter up against Sailor Moon for the title, and tonight, CWF Raw is brought to you by the only motor oil that provides maximum protection. Castroil GTX, DRIVE HARD!! KING: And by 1-800-COLLECT!! Save a BUCK or TWO!! KAI: And bwy Shnickersh!! Hungry?! WHY WAIT?! Grabw a Shnickersh!! KING: And Sailor Jupiter can't WAIT to grab that World title for her own, but...she's grabbing a mic. JR: Now SHE might go against Sailor Moon here. JUPITER: Hey, Sailor Moon, I thought you were gonna give ME that title shot FIRST, BEFORE you decided to hog the spotlight. You WERE my FRIEND, but NOW I have no CHOICE but to kick your SCRAWNY STANKY ASS, and get what is rightfully mine, which is the CWF Title!! KING: WOW!! JR: She said that Sailor Moon WAS her friend?! Sailor Moon's music starts, and she comes out to the ring. JR: And here she comes. Ask and you shall recieve, and she isn't wasting any time, and here we go. Sailor Moon and Sailor Jupiter, fighting for the CWF World Title. That is on the line here tonight. Jupiter, getting the early advantage with those shots to the stomach, and now backed into a corner goes the CWF Champion. KING: Not a very good place to be if you are in the match with Jupiter. KAI: Very good martial artsh mashter!! And a great bwrawler, ash well. JR: OH MY, AND SHE SHOWED IT WITH THAT DEVILISSHLY HIGH MARTIAL ARTS KICK THAT WENT SQUARE INTO MOON'S FACE, AND...OH WAIT A MINUTE, LOOKS WHOS UP ON THE STAGE!! KAI: SHAILOR MARSH!! KING: WHAT IS SHE DOING OUT HERE?! JR: SHE SAID THAT SHE WANTED MOON TO WIN THIS BECAUSE THAT WHO SHE WANTS HERE TONIGHT TO BE UP AGAINST FOR THE TITLE, ASSUMING THAT MARS CAN GET PAST Y2J, CHRIS JERICHO, AS WELL!! JUPITER, WITH A SAMOAN DROP ON SAILOR MOON!! 1, AND ONLY A COUNT OF ONE THAT TIME, AS MOON QUICKLY GETS OUT OF THAT PINFALL ATTEMPT!! KAI: MOON ISH NOT GONNA GIVE UP THAT EASHILY!! JR: OH I WON'T DOUBT THAT AT ALL!! MOON, NOW, WITH JUPITER, AND SCOOP AND SLAM, TO THE ROPES, AND NICE DROP TOE HOLD THERE INTO THE CROSS FACE, AND MOON QUICKLY REACHES FOR THE ROPES TO GET OUT OF THAT THING!! KAI: VERY DANGEROUSH ISH THISH SHAILOR JUPITER!! KING: RIGHT!! JR: AND LOOK AT SAILOR MARS, TAUNTING SAILOR MOON, AND NOW JUPITER HAS SPOTTED HER, AND IS TELLING FOR HER NOT TO GET INVOLVED IN THIS MATCHUP!! SENDING MOON TO THE ROPES, AND...HURRICURANA BY SAILOR JUPITER, HOOKS THE LEGS, 2, REVERSAL, 2, KICKOUT AFTER TWO!! KING: WHAT A FAST PACED MATCH SO FAR!! JR: I'M SEEING THAT JUPITER IS REALLY GETTING THE UPPER HAND HERE!! JUPITER, NOW, WITH MOON AGAIN, AND MOON NOW, FIGHTING BACK WITH THOSE RIGHT HANDS TO THE FACE, TO THE ROPES, AND...JACKHAMMER BY JUPITER, COUNTERING THAT MOVE THERE!! KAI: THE HEIGHT ON THAT ONE WASH AMAZING!! KING: AND SHE CAME DOWN HARD!! JR: SAILOR MOON IS IN A DEEP AMOUNT OF TROUBLE HERE, AND SAILOR JUPITER IS GOING UP TO THE TOP, AND..WAIT A MINUTE, SAILOR MARS IS COMING CLOSER TO THE RING HERE, AND NOW JUPITR HAS CEASED PUTTING MOON AWAY, AND NOW JUPITER AND MARS ARE EXCHANGING SOME WORDS, AND MOON IS GOING TO THE OUTSIDE NOW, AND NOW A SLUGFEST ON THE OUTSIDE HERE!! JUPITER AND MOON...AD MARS JUST GOT SAILOR MOON WITH THAT CLOSELINE AND NOW SHE AND JUPITER ARE FIGHTING, AND [the bell rings. The match is a double countout] THE BELL HAS RUNG!! I GUESS THAT THIS WILL BE A DOUBLE COUNTOUT!! SAILOR MOON KEEPS THE TITLE, BUT WE HAVE A FALLING OUT HERE!! SAILOR MARS AND SAILOR JUPITER, AND SAILOR MOON STRIKES BOTH OF THEM IN THE HEAD WITH CLOSELINES!! KAI: THISH ISH SHTARTING TO DO WHAT I THOUGHT WASH GONNA HAPPEN!! THE SHAILORSH ALL WANT THEIR SHOT AT THE CWF TITLE, AAND THEY ARE PUTTING THEIR FRIENDSHIPSH ASHIDE TO DO SHO!! KING: AND LISTEN TO THE WORDS FROM MOON TO MARS AND VICE VERSA!! JR: THIS IS SOMETHING THAT'S GONNA ONLY GET WORSE AS THE NIGHT PROGRESSES.. Switch to the back, where the Ackolytes are coming into the arena...WITH MIA IN THE MIDDLE, arms wrapped around both Farroqq and Bradshaw. FARROQQ: THE GOOD LIFE, FINALLY!! BRADSHAW: NOTHING LIKE SOME HARD WHISKY TO SOOTH YOUR NEEDS, ISN'T IT, MIA?! MIA: YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT IT IS!! YOU WERE THE BEST MEAT I HAD YET, BRADSHAW!! FARROQQ: YOU WERE TEARING HER UP LAST NIGHT, MAN!! AND MIA, I CAN'T SAY ANY BAD THINGS ABOUT WHAT YOU WERE DOING TO HIM LAST NIGHT, EITHER!! JR: OH MAN!! MIA: HOW ABOUT TONIGHT, WHEN WE'RE DONE WITH WHAT WE NEED TO DO HERE, WE CAN GET BACK INTO THE HOTEL ROOM, AND YOU BOTH CAN HAVE ME, ANYWAY YOU WISH!! KING: AHHH!! OH MY GOD!! KAI: ANYONE FOR A COLD SHOWER!! I MIGHT NEED ONE AFTER THAT LITTLE SHTATEMENT!! JR: MIA IS WITH THE ACKOLYTES, BUT WHAT DO KENTO AND ROWIN FEEL ABOUT THIS SITUATION!! Switch to another part in the back, where Chris Jericho is coming out to the ring. JR: Coming up next, Y2J will go up against Sailor Mars, winner to meet Sailor Moon for the title later tonight. That's all when we come back. End first hour. ______________________________________________________ CWF WAR ZONE WEEK #29 RATING: TV-14 DVL E-MAIL: darkpowrjd@aol.com DISCLAIMER: You know THIS one! ______________________________________________________ ANNOUNCERS: Jim Ross Jerry "The King" Lawler BACKSTAGE: Lucas (from WWF.com) Kevin Kelly Michael Cole The New Guy RING ANN.: Lillian Garcia PLACE: Selland Arena in Fresno, Califonia WEB SITE: http://www.officialcwf.cjb.net ______________________________________________________ As they start the second hour, Sailor Mars' music starts, and he comes out to the ring. JR: Welcome back to CWF, and neither King Kai or The New Guy are here to do the second hour, King. KING: That means we now have the announcing position to ourselves!! JR: And Sailor Mars is coming out to the ring. She will face Y2J, Chris Jericho, the winner to face Sailor Moon later tonight for the title. KING: And now she KNOWS that if she wins this one tonight, then she WILL have Sailor Moon to worry about to get the title to become hers JR: And THQ, the makers of WWF Smack Down for the Playstation Game Console, presents CWF Wrestlemania 2000, Sunday, April 2nd, live from the sold out Fort Lauderdale Arena in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, and only on Pay Per View. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, 0!!.......BOOOMMM!! Chris Jericho's music starts, and he comes out rushing to the ring!! JR: AND HERE WE GO!! JERICHO AND MARS, FOR A SHOT AT THE TITLE!! JERICHO TO THE ROPES, DUCKS UNDERNEATH THE CLOSELINE, AND FLYING CLOSELINE BY Y2J!! JERICHO, NOW WITH MARS, AND SENDS HER TO THE ROPES, AND A SPINNING NECK BREAKER BY SAILOR MARS THAT TURNED THE TIDE QUICKLY IN THIS MATCHUP!! KING: SAILOR MARS WANTS THAT TITLE SHOT BAD BECAUSE SHE KNOWS WHO SHE FACES NOW IF SHE GETS THAT TITLE SHOT TONIGHT!! JR: SHE HAS STATED THAT SHE WANTS TO FACE SAILOR MOON FOR THE TITLE TONIGHT, AND SHE MIGHT..GET HER CHANCE TONIGHT!! WHAT A GREAT BACKBREAKER FROM THAT TILT-A-WHIRL THAT WAS!! MARS, NOW, WITH JERICHO AGAIN, AND...WAIT A MINTUE, LOOK WHOS UP THERE NOW!! KING: SAILOR MOON, THE CWF CHAMPION!! JR: SHE WANTS A BIRD'S EYE VIEW OF THIS MATCHUP, AND SHE IS GETTING ONE ALRIGHT!! KING: AHH!! JR: AND JERICHO DUMPED MARS ALMOST IN OUR LAPS HERE!! KING: LOOK OUT HERE!! JR: JERICHO SLAMMING MARS' HEAD RIGHT INTO OUR TABLE HERE!! KING: TAKE THIS SOMEWHERE ELSE!! JR: JERICHO, TAKING MARS TO THE STEEL STAIRS, ELBOW TO THE STENEM ON Y2J, AND HIS HEAD TASTES THE STEEL!! WHOEVER WINS THIS MATCH HERE TONIGHT WILL GO ON TO MEET SAILOR MOON HERE LATER TONIGHT!! MARS SENDING JERICHO BACK TO THE RING!!! KING: UH, JR, MOON HAS GONE A LITTLE BIT CLOSER TO THE RING HERE!! JR: GREAT POINT!! MOON HAS GONE A LITTLE CLOSER TO THE RING NOW, AS THE MATCH CONTINUES!! MARS, NOW, WITH JERICHO, AND TO THE TOP ROPE, AND MISSLE DROP KICK ON JERICHO, 2, KICKOUT AFTER 2!! KING: WE HAVE SEEN SOME GREAT MATCHES HERE SO FAR, JR!! JR: WHAT A NIGHT IT HAS BEEN A HELL OF A NIGHT THUS FAR, AND SMETHING TELLS ME THAT THIS NIGHT IS JUST GETTING STARTED HERE!! MARS, AGAIN WITH JERICHO, TURNING HIM ON HIS BACK, AND THIS IS THE MOVE THAT PUT KURT ANGLE AWAY LAST WEEK!! THE MARS STOMP, SHE CALLS IT, AND..JERICHO MOVED OUT OF THE WAY, AND SAILOR MARS FELL TO THE CANVAS, AND NOW HE'S GOING TO SLAP ON THE WALLS OF JERICHO, AND HE...GETS IT ON, AND SAILOR MARS IS SCREAMING IN PAIN !! JUST LIKE THAT, THE MATCH HAS TUNRNED IN THE FAVOR OF Y2J!! KING: ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN IN THESE MATCHES, JR!! THEY ARE SO UNPREDICTABLE!! JR: BUT NOW MARS IS TRYING TO REACH FOR THE ROPES, AND MOON IS RIGHT NEAR THE RING NOW, AND SHE...SHOVES MARS AWAY FROM THE ROPES, AND JERICHO DRAGS HER BACK TO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING, WALLS OF JERICHO STILL SLAPPED ON, AND...SHE'S TAPPING OUT!! SAILOR MARS DID NOT DO IT, AND NOW Y2J HAS THE CHANCE TONIGHT TO BECOME CWF CHAMPION, WHILE SAILOR MARS MUST WAIT FOR ANOTHER DAY, AND...UH OH!! KING: SAILOR MARS AND SAILOR MOON ARE MEETING EYE TO EYE AGAIN!! JR: THEY ARE EXCHANGING HEATED WORDS AGAIN!! KING: SHE SAID TO WAIT UNTIL LATER TONIGHT!! SHE'S GETTING A REAL SURPRISE!! JR: WHAT IN THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?! WHAT IS THAT SURPRISE THAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT... She walks out, but a few fans are BOOING her now. She flips off those certain fans. KING: She's not getting as warm of a welcome as she is used to... Switch to the back, where Kento and Rowin are coming out to the ring. JR: Wait a minute. The hell are those two coming out here for?! KING: They saw Mia and the Ackolytes come into the Arena in Fresno, as well. JR: What the hell are they gonna say when they come out here?! They will be out here next!! [start CWF promo] All of a sudden...A CAR RAMS HIM IN THE MIDSECTION, CAUSING HIM TO GET FLOWN 5 FEET IN THE AIR, AND BACK ONTO THE GROUND HARD!! JR: WAIT A MINUTE!! MY GOD, THAT CAR JUST HIT NAPPA DEAD ON,...IT WAS THE BIG SHOW!! Talpa gets back up and...HITS THE ROCK FROM BEHIND!! ...KING: TALPA IS ANGRY!! ....JR: THE ROCK, SET UP....TALPADRIVER, AND THESE FANS DON'T SEEM TO LIKE THAT TURN OF EVENTS ONE LITTLE BIT, EITHER!! ...JR: QUEEN SERENITY IS GOING AFTER THE GAME!...MOON AND MERCURY, AND THEY ARE SLU... THE...RUNNING POWERBOMB, 1.......2.......3!!! WE'VE GOT OUR BRAND NEW CHAMPION!! ANN: Relive the night. CWF No Way Out, the encore presentation, tommorrow night, and only on Pay Per View. [end CWF promo] They then go to a break, then come back. [start CWF promo] The scene is on an elevator. Standard elevator music is playing. Gohan is standing on the left, holding a bag of Sonic Sour Cream Doritos. The doors open, and Ash walks in, holding a bag of Baja Picante Doritos. He nods in acknowledgement of Gohan. ANN.: Which is louder, New Baja Picante Doritos? Ash eats one of his Doritos, and suddenly, Latin music fills the elevator. They look at the one speaker in shock. ANN.: Or New Sonic Sour Cream? Gohan eats one of his Doritos, and loud rock and roll music replaces the Latin music. He starts banging his head to it. Ash retorts by eating another one of his, and the Latin music is back. He starts dancing to the music. The two duke it out in such fashion, until they BOTH eat a Dorito at the same time. Here, the music gets REALLY screwed up, the elevator starts going up and down rapidly, electricity floods the elevator, as well as flying Doritos. ASH & GOHAN: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! The speaker explodes just as another passenger is about to board. The doors open, and Ash is trembling violently, and Gohan collapses on the floor. ANN.: New louder Doritos. Now seven wild ways to get your daily dose of LOUD. [end CWF promo] They come back to ringside, and the Ronin music starts. Kento and Rowin comes out to a bunch of boos from the crowd. JR: Welcome back to RAW, everyone, and here come the losers from last night, and I say losers because they lost to the Damn Dudleys last night in Toronto. KING: No Kidding, and that was because Kento and Rowin were more interested to know why Mia liked the Ackolytes so much, but I can tell THEM why she is WITH them, JR!! Isn't it obvious by NOW?! JR: I am questioning why it is any of their BUSINESS what she does with her private life!! They have no right to do such a thing to Mia, but even I have to question HER discretion after what side of her she showed us last Thursday on Smack Down when she was, well, DRUNK!! KING: WELL, I SUPPOSE YOU NEVER WENT OUT AND GET YOURSELF HUNG OVER WITH A FEW SHOTS, DIDN'T YOU?! JR: IN FACT, KING, I don't drink at ALL. KING: Oh, you're LYING!! You probably go to the nearest bar in Fresno when RAW is over. JR: Well, if I DO, it's only a few. KING: I TOLD ya. KENTO: FARROQQ!! BRADSHAW!! YOU BRING BACK MIA TO US RIGHT THIS INSTANT, SHUT UP!! [crowd boos relentlessly] JR: WOW!! KING: I DON'T WANT TO BE IN HIS WAY ANYTIME TONIGHT! ROWIN: WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF.. [he puts the hand the mic is in down in disgust bacause he can't get a word in edgewise due to the loud boos circulating thoughout the arena] KING: SHUT UP, YOU IDIOTS!! LET THEM FINISH!! JR: THEY ARE REALLY LETTING THE RONINS KNOW WHAT THEY THINK OF THEM!! ROWIN: WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF ALL OF THE CRAP THAT YOU TWO ARE PUTTING INTO MIA'S HEAD, AND WE ARE ALSO SICK AND TIRED OF ALL OF YOU FANS BOOING US TO HELL, SO YOU BETTER SHUT THE HELL UP!!!! KING: MAN!! JR: THEY ARE IN A REAL FOUL MOOD TONIGHT!! KENTO: ACKOLYTES, YOU WANT TO COME OUT HERE AND DELIVER MIA TO US, OR DO WE HAVE TO COME TO THE BACK AND KICK YOUR ASSES UNTIL WE HAVE HER BACK WITH US?!! KING: THERE'S AN ULTIMATUM!! ROWIN: COME ON... The Ackolytes come out with Mia to the stage. JR: And here they come, and they are with Mia. KING: My God, and Mia ia LAUGHING!! MIA: Hey, BOYS, and yeah, I do say BOYS because, well, that's all that YOU will ever BE when it COUNTS, if you know what I'm SAYING!! Hell, compared to THESE guys, you two would need a TWEEZER to find YOUR MANHOOD!! KING: WOAH!! JR: They didn't like THAT!! MIA: You see, the Ackolytes didn't FORCE me to be with them. I CHOSE to be with them. These two, Farroqq and Bradshaw [swinging a leg front to back and vice versa while standing][smiles]?! Well, I WANTED to have THEM, because THEY are two REAL men, something that YOU two will never, EVER be. KING: UH OH!! JR: Those two are not liking this. KENTO: Well, how about THIS!! If you don't come back with us, THEIR MANHOOD won't BE there anymore, because WE'LL TEAR THOSE DAMN THINGS OFF OF THEIR SCRAWNY ASS BODIES!! JR: GOOD LORD!! KING: They are REALLY not in the mood to play around!! FARROQQ: Hey, Bradshaw, want to show these BOYS what it's like to be with some REAL men?! BRADSHAW: It's okay with me. JR: And here they come..WAIT A MINUTE, MIA STOPPED THEM!! MIA: HEY, DON'T GO IN THERE WITHOUT ME!! SAVE SOME FOR ME!! JR: And here SHE comes!! KING: The Ackolytes and Mia are storming the ring!! JR: And here we go, And Farroqq ALMOST TAKES ROWINS HEAD OFF WITH THAT CLOSELINE, AND BRADSHAW HAS KENTO UP AND IN THE AIR, AND...BACK DOWN WITH THE PRESS SLAM!! AND NOW BRADSHAW HAS KENTO IN THE CORNER, AND HERE COMES MISA WITH KICKS TO THE RIBS OF KENTO!! AND KICK TO THE FACE, AND NOW SHE WANTS A PIECE OF ROWIN, AND... KING: LOOKATTHIS!! JR: SHE HAS HIM ON HER SHOLDERS, AND...SHE PREFORMS A RUNNING POWERSLAM!! MY GOD, SHE IS DISMANTLING...WAIT A MINUTE!! KING: SHE'S GONNA TRY TO POWERBOMB ROWIN!! JR: FARROQQ AND BRADSHAW...WITH A DOUBLE POWERBOMB ON KENTO, AND MIA...GETTING HIM UP, AND... KING: WHA..?! JR: POWERBOMB!! POWERBOMB!! MIA JUST POWERBOMBED ROWIN!! RONIN WARRIORS KENTO AND ROWIN JUST GOT THE HELL BEAT OUT OF HIM BY THE ACKOLYTES AND MIA!! KING: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!! MIA: HEY, LET'S TALK NOW ABOUT THAT ROOM OF OURS!! THESE LAST COUPLE OF NIGHTS, YOU TWO WERE MINE!! WELL, TONIGHT, I AM ALL YOURS!! KING: AHHH!! JR: OH MAN, AND THE ACKOLYTES ARE GOING OUT OF THE RING, AND..MIA STRADDLES ONTO THE BACK OF BRADSHAW!! KING: MY GOD!! BRADSHAW, CAN I TAKE YOUR PLACE! I WANT TO BE AN ACKOLYTE NOW!! They exit with Mia still strapped around the back of Bradshaw. Switch to the back, where Sailor Moon is coming out to the ring. KING: AND THERE IS SOMEONE IN WHO'S SITUATION I WOULDN'T WANT TO BE IN RIGHT NOW!! JR; SHE IS THE CWF CHAMPION, AND SHE WILL FACE Y2J FOR THE TITLE HERE TONIGHT, COMING UP NEXT, BUT SHE IS ALSO SEEING THE GROUP WHICH SHE HELPED CREATE, THE SAILORS, GROW FURTHER AND FURTHER APART!! WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN, TITLE, ON THE LINE, MOON VS. JERICHO, NEXT!! They go to their final commercial break, then they come back. Jericho's intro starts, and he comes out to the ring. JR: WELCOME BACK TO CWF RAW, AND WE HAVE TAKEN ALL OF OUR COMMERCIAL BREAKS, WE ARE STAYING RIGHT HERE, AND Y2J CHRIS JERICHO WILL BE UP AGAINS SAILR MOON FOR THE CWF WORLD TITLE!! KING; How much do you want to bet that all of the Sailors are watching this one in SEPERATE LOCKER ROOMS?! JR: I WOULD BET MY LIFE ON THAT ONE!! Sailor Moon's music starts, and here she comes. JR: AND HERE COMES SAILOR MOON, AND SHE ISN'T WASTING ANY TIME!! THIS TITLE MATCH IS UNDERWAY, AND SAILOR MOON NOW, TRYING TO GET THIS THING DONE IN A HURRY!! TO THE ROPES, AND SPINNING NECK BREAKER BY SAILOR MOON...OH NO, NOT AGAIN!! KING: THERE'S SAILOR MARS AGAIN!! WHAT IS SHE DOING OUT HERE THIS TIME?! JR: SAILOR MOON HAS SEEN HER, AS WELL, AND NOWMOON AND MARS, ONCE AGAIN EXCHANGING THOSE HEATED WORDS!! BACK TO THE MATCH, TO THE ROPES GOES SAILOR MOON ONCE AGAIN, AND HERE COMES SAILOR MARS, AND SHE ENTERS THE RING, AND...SUPLEX ON JERICHO BY MARS, AND THIS WILL BE A BLEANTIANT DQ HERE, AND...MARS STOMP ON Y2J, BUT MOON IS STILL THE CHAMPION!! KING: SHE WANTED SAILOR MOON TO FACE HER FOR THE TITLE, AND SHE'S GOING TO MAKE SURE THAT IT IS THAT WAY!! JR: WAIT A MINUTE, HERE COMES HER BOYFRIEND, CASTO SOMMERS, BUT WE NOW KNOW THAT THAT IS SAILOR MOON'S BROTHER, BECAUSE SERENA IS MOON, AND SERENA IS CASTO'S SISTER, AS WELL. KING: MOON AND SERENA...UH OH!! JR: HE'S GOING TO SEE IF HE CAN'T KEEP THIS UNDER CONTROL!! KING: HE WANTS COOLER HEADS TO PREVAIL, JR!! LIKE THAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN ANYTIME SOON!! JR: SAILOR MARS AND CASTO SOMMERS!! CASTO IS TALKING TO HIS GIRLFRIEND HERE...WAIT A MINUTE!! KING: HERE COMES DARKPOWER AGAIN!! JR: HE WAS HERE EARLIER TONIGHT, AND HE'S COMING OUT HERE AGAIN, AND HE'S ON THE RING APRON...WHAT DOES HE GOT IN HIS HAND!! He hits..SAILOR MOON IN THE HEAD!! SHE FALLS UNCONCIOUS!! JR: WAIT A MINUTE!! WAIT JUST A DAMN MINUTE!! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?! DARKPOWER HAS JUST HIT SAILOR MOON IN THE HEAD WITH WHATEVER THE HELL THAT DAMN THING WAS!! KING: AND CASTO IS TRYING TO GO AFTER DARKPOWER!! JR: CASTO JUST ABOUT HAVE THE SAME TRAITS AS SERENA DOES!! YOU DON'T HARM HIS FAMILY, AND HE'S IN THE FACE OF DARKPOWER HERE, AD THEY ARE EXCHANGING WORDS, AND.. In a blink of an eye...SAILOR MARS DOES A LOW BLOW ON CASTO SOMMERS!! HE FALLS DOWN IN PAIN!! JR: WAIT A DAMN MINUTE!! WHAT THE HELL?! KING: WHAT IN THE WORLD?! JR: RAYE HINO JUST DID A LOW BLOW ON HER OWN BOYFRIEND!! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ALL ABOUT, AND SHE'S HAMMERING AWAY AT CASTO HERE!! WHAT THE HELL IS ALL OF THIS?! Then Mars turns to Darkpower, and they...KISS IN THE CENTER OF THE RING! KING: WHAA...?! JR: OH MY GOD, NO!! DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME THAT THIS IS TRUE!! THIS WAS THE DAMN SURPRISE THAT SAILOR MARS HAS JOINED DARKPOWER! AND SHE IS IN DP'S ARMS!! AND CASTO IS BACK UP, AND...DARKPOWER JUST PUNCHED HIM WITH WHATEVER THAT WAS THAT HE HAD IN HIS HAND!! THIS IS A NIGHTMARE!! SAILOR MARS HAS TURNED HER BACK ON THE PEOPLE WHO CARED ABOUT HER, AND SHE HAS JOINED THAT SLIME!! THAT JACKASS!! KING: I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!! JR: IS SALOR MARS' DARKPOWER'S MEAL TICKET FOR THE CWF TITLE?! THIS MAKES ME SICK!! They kiss again as RAW goes off the air. See you this Thursday.